Monkay See Monkey Do

The world traveler began to see that the world wasn't everything he wanted to see
He'd wasted his time traversing the plains and finding nothing of value under the grains of sand
No buried treasures, no fossils of old, no nothing, just more dirt, more grains passing through his hand
And in the beginning there was nothing more that he wanted to do than seek out simple truths
To find all that he held dear at the end of a rope bridge, while fragile it was exciting to see what was on the other side
The world traveler was naive back then, he thought all out there, all the truth was here
In the big wide world of nothing, he could find something, some new big blue and green
Eden was gone, but he'd try to seek it out, travel on and find out who needed nothing
There is a world that you need to see that he wants you to see and its right infront of you
do you see the ways the sunlight shines through on this glorious day
So here goes the pace.

Rainbow Room

I witnessed a bunch of asses wash upon the shore

These men were witless and spoiled

Wanting too much but never having enough

They got what they wanted

And begged for what they needed

And they lived in utter excess

This is the world we see through this shattered glass

A place of nastiness

The place to seak out your truth is not with such people

Over on the other side of the wall

There sits the boy who has nothing and only seeks out what he needs

And only a few extras

He wants the moon on his strings

But he won't pull it forth to him less he screw up the tides

Its the world he see's of so many men

Who scrap about for food in the gutter

and he is thankful,

He doesn't need excess

He is happy with what he has

As long as he has life.

the world faded into black

As the script ended

and here I was on the edge

lighted by cryptic light

reading the epilogue 

in monotone

I hear the sounds of worlds

Crying out in grace

and here we are in nothing new

Old and fashionable and understated

And while the ashes may have fallen

I can look back and see the joys of sunshine

In that vast openness of possibility

Life was never to hard

When there were people like you in it

If the feeling is fleeting or if it had lasted lifetimes

It's comforting to know that such dreams

such dream are reality

and on this void

In this flash of my life I see the others like you

the friends and family

the life and joys

and underneath maybe some hidden grief

But overall the world had a spotlight

It had an audience

The drama was real

The comedy was genuine

here is the truthfulness of it all

The sweet spots in a sour world.

very few passion plays are about what this represents
in the span of a few minutes i've seen a white light
at the end of a very dark and gloomy tunnel
My soul a benchmark of depression seemed rotted and remorseful
But in the years that have passed
It has shown signs of reprisal
It has come back to its orginal glories
And joy has become a common part of the tunnels foundation
And that white light seems imminent in its powers of worth
The world is bleak sometimes,
Its passions strange
But in this solitude I have found something great
Except anyone to truly share it with
I feel thankful of my life being whole again
Of being able to smile daily and see peace and love in everything
An understanding a fun loving stamina filled sprint
Across the vastness of everything
When once I was stranded inside that darkened underground path,
Now I am free to leave it, and not discouraged when I think of it
But times go by that I dream of home,
That I want it back the way it was
But its only a matter of time before I get worried about having nothing
That I can't do this all alone
And I hope that life will find a way to help this thing along
This longing to share my high spirits.

Visions of a Mist

Keep out the sour right now
He begs
Just let it fester over there in the corner
His spirits are too high to be poisoned by idiots
he is to hopeful to be let down
Perhaps this is bad
he doesn't care
He's ready to leap if the sign is given
But he'll stand still till then
He'll let time bide itself
and see what it comes up with
he is happy again, he was fading from happiness for a moment
But now he returns reinvigorated
And everything seems to be going smoothly
He'll play it well
As well as he can
And what comes will come
Maybe let downs, and a fading good-bye, nothing harsh
Just honesty
Or maybe there'll be embraces and gentle kisses
And everything else that comes in time
he'll keep it steady
His voice will be ready
For whichever way comes,
His soul is strong,
And he'll either keep it strong, or let it melt
Depending on if saddness or happiness tries to gain access
So smile all you people
Because sometimes life makes sense
And your hopes can be met
And if they are not you have the hope that the attempt was not futile
Just in the wrong place at the wrong time
Here goes nothing
he says
Open again to the elements
He'll take what dreams may come.

Any Which Way the Madness of Happiness Blows

In the blink of an eye all we wished will wash away in wishy washy serenditipity
Coincidence is golden, randomness is key
A big bang of the small fry seeking out answers to the chaos of his universe
With spectral glasses on, and heavy heart upon his shoulders
He'll have blood on his clothes but courage in his loins
And he'll make it out alive

All of their wonderful reflections break upon the shore

A seashell chorus creacking on and forever more

A well to do of how you do's

that no one reply's back to

Only wolf whistles on the back of a carriage of thistles can be interpreted as true

Barnacles hang off the bottom of this ship

And mice care not to give two shits

As icebergs break upon the bow

But back to sanity they yell for us not wanting our minds to wander through the wanderous desert

Seeking out closeted deserts of yogurt ice cream and bumble bee tuna

Christmas tree's with Jack-o-lanters face the raging sea way

As pickled dolphins leap in bounds from jam jars half full of constant regrets

While they brood and they ponder and the elevate the ladders

To reach for the heavens far too high above

The little dwarf man demands a penny for his thought but is given negative change instead



So men who are robbed of dignity

And placed inside the realm of dishonesty

Where the worker bee and ant meet to socialize

drinking and referring to their troubles

These men want more than ever to find that purpose

That plagues the roaches so

But as she blinked her eyes,

and made to cry

Her will power faded into nothing

And the lack of oxygen

made her misunderstood

For want of everything

They gave her nothing

All the while she cried

The world walked by

And demanded she repay her debt

When asked what it was

they laughed while shaking their feet

Brittle bones protect solid hearts

While solid bones protect brittle hearts

and the mermen and merwoman debate on what to do with the king crab who snapped onto their tails

Whisked away upon the sea breeze while waterfalls punctuated the silence with lip syncing of a favorite rock and roll ballad

A minute later the octopus wonders what arm to put his bracelets on

And seeks out places with little traces of any sort of fashion sense.

A million miles south of normal

the oddball plants his trees

He calls them forth to prosper upwards

While holding back a sneeze

So There's This Girl...

I think its official,
I actually met someone that I want to get to know more
And then some more after that
But I come out too strong
I talk too much
Say too much
Do too much
This has never been easy for me
I'm constantly paranoid im going to screw things up
And then I screw things up
I have such anxiety, and fear
I always feel inadequate,
While knowing im a good person
not a great person, because who is honestly,
but a good person,
I mean I don't know if it'll all go anywhere,
Its too early,
I'm trying to pace myself and not get caught up in the moment
But its been awhile since I could muster up the guts to even talk to a girl
And here I have again,
And I want so badly to avoid my own traps
I'm just far too excited,
Maybe I should back it off a couple notches
Life is still going to be there,
I still have time.

Its Time to Light the Lights

So i think its high time
That things stayed on the down low
i should stop spewing out every little thing
i should abandon my whim and seek out solitude
I want to find a way to make myself happy
I want to feel something again
I've been godo with life
But nothing is really
Going on
And now I say good bye
Again.

Shouting!

She wore a checkered flag bandana
On the end of a bananana
And casty her doubts like skipping stones
Into the lone hearth
All the world fell to nothing as she flew away into the sun
A rainbow that just wouldn't stop
And scattered all the way
It isn't happy go lucky time in this dire strained confusion
A vomiting inducing sickness

High upon the mountain tops

The princess slowly sobs

Seeking refuge in her tears

and finding only soggy hands

But somehow this place is brand new

And old again

Refreshing but confusing

And the minimalist

Sets her sights on everything

And slowly shaves off the fat

But for what purpose

God only knows

But he doesn't answer

The phone calls of greed

Of gold stacking

of paper machet

Whispering in the night the silly man

Wants to take her hand

And be happy with everything he can be

But he is too afraid to leap

So it might help if she pushes

and send him plummeting down to the rock bed below

Cushioned by seventy seven pillows

Devoid of feathers

on top of fourty four mattresses

Coated in honey combs.

Being a Corporate Pawn

There is minor influence in scaling the walls of a heirachy when you don't believe in it
You work at a location that promotes doing what you can for the client
But only if it doesn't deter from the betting schemes they have in place
But you are still continously reminded to do whatever you can do make sure the clients go home happy
So when you do something nice for one single person, once a day, for maybe once a month
You are caught slapped on the wrist and told not to do it again
Or the men wearing the crowns will get mad and kick you to the curb
And the lower management doesn't care about the cash you save someone but they care about their job
They want you to not get fired because of it
So it's this corporate greed, and this confusing store philosophy that makes you scratch your head.

Life Isn't Over

Do you see the places out there amongst the ash
They still have flowers in bloom
Fruits that sing in the rain,
Amongst all this decay, this shamble of a place
The sunshine still breaks through the smog
And coats the world in a glistening blanket
Protected and warm,
And everlasting smiles worm their way upon the smoke and clouds
This place is so worn and bruised and lost
Still has a spark.

A Confession of the Obvious

sometimes I find it so hard to say anything while I am boiling up with things to say
I am lost for words while words are sitting at the edge of my lips ready to take a plunge
i really want to converse to find something to say to not be the timid guy, but I can't bring myself to do it,
I want so much to be that person, who knows how to say it, and say it right, who knows how to find the course of action in his battle plans
but he can not,
I am reduced to this, but thats only partially an insult
Becuase i love writing on my blog, I love saying random stuff,
I love writing in general,
but somewhere, i want my thoughts to come out somewhere, somehow verbally,
just to say one thing interesting,
To make that leap into confidence,
That i know is there, when im comfortable I can talk a mile a minute and just as lenghthy keep up the pace
Say things interesting,
just jump about and make people life, and being ridiculous,
This of course all comes back to meeting women
to find a way to say what I want to say when I want to say it and not fret about it at all
This isn't suppose to be a confession,
Well all of this stuff is confession,
However cryptic,
But im so timid,
So worried, and flustered when I suddenly develp that school yard word of a crush and i have nothing to say,
When all I want to do is sing, shout, say hey here i am
I hope they understand that its not easy for me to do this,
But that im not always so damned timid,
I want to reach out and find a solution to this issue,
But im so introverted hence the blog,
Hence these writings,
hence my life.

Blankity Blank again.

She lived a humdrum life on the verge of extinction only to find her savior at the bottom of a bottle
Her mind warped it all into a little bit of this, and a whole lot of that
She is everything they wanted, but not enough
Contradictions, i'm using far too many contradictions,
Always do, but i never did it on purpose
they roll of the tongue,
Or should I say through the fingertips.

The Problem with This

I don't see the way to view the world through a kaleidoscope
Only how to see it through black and white lenses
Like an old fashioned movie

This idealistic view of nothing will one day of course be shattered
Already is,
Already has.

It's a time for nothing to be done and everything in particular to be changed,
The useless information that falls into this
And returns to that only to find it all broken,
This glass unicorn upon the concrete wall.

Don't you see the frustration
The battered condemnation
By men in a thousand nations
Seeking out the useless information.

Here we go again,
In this place that nobody see's
In this place that everybody is watching.

The world will always consist of those who saw it all in water color
and in technicolor
and those who remained, and will always be color blinded.

Their reds are black,
Their greens are gray
There rainbows are distraught in the their blandness.

And in these lush gray beautiful black skies
Where cyclones twirl
Men are thrown around like popsicles
and left upon a smoldering paved way
by those in the sunshine states.

Cataclysm jumps to mind
Catastrophe,
A void darkened and bruised.

this is everything that everything warned you about
and that everyone in every room told everybody else to find
Don't do it,
But please do it again.

Its the same old song and dance,
The same old tune
That replays always and forever
till someone throws that radio out the window
and shatters that glass.

Serenade of a Frozen Mob

The world falls into a little bit of a dream as the lull of stupidity arrives

And destroys everything was once good, and irritated about it all

In this spectrum of hilarity where everyone is pulling their hair out

The queen bee is angry strange and funky

The end of the earth is nigh but here we are stranded on a desert island of desert sharks

Who eat them forever and ever and our eyes roll back in distraction

Dead gone, until we can be freed from this horror,

Its ridiculous all the ways we will put up with nothing in order to find something on the other side of everything

Upside down this rainbow road of spines.

Under the Big Top

She wears a blacked out version of disrespect

A whited out position on the worst case scenario

And in the waves of ridiculousness he feels altered

In her presence he feels lost and ridiculed

But she goes on her merry little way prancing about like a circus pony

Drawing in the gaze of a thousand spectators

Who wilt away under the firelight of her torch light

And as fireflies dance on the graves of these young old people

They will fade away too

Fade fast into a beautiful oblivion,

Into a far off place off set by an airline that got the destination completely wrong

He was hurt and wounded in her presence but he needed to be there

When all else seemed lost he had to stay and ponder it

He had to dream it,

And ultimately conceive of a better solution to the obsolete verdict that was him

She smiled on though, convinced of her superiority

Convinced in the conviction of a thrown out case that she was one in a billion

When she was only one and the same

Slithering under her spotlight, but still drawing in the sights of the predators

High strung and lethal predators,

And as the flight descended at an alarming rate the whole world flashed by in waves of fogged images

And it was completely lost amongst the stars as to what this place truly was

And finally when they both removed their shoes and threw away their parachutes

They could finally have what they wanted, though they had no time to have it at all

For in their dream scape of their dreamland it was full of existence

Their reality was scattered rubble upon a broken gravel street

In a place that closely resembled hellfire and brimstone.

Writers Block

The quiver of the quiver
in the fingertips of my elder
brain on the verge of decay
of the sore spot left on the left side of the page
a starting word for a beginning sentence
with no place to go
lost in thought
flabbergasted by the influence of the soulless
a battered bridge in need of repair
no time to fret
no time to fix
at the start of the second act
no one has a chance
within their hands are blank pages
contradicted
broken and retracted
a fuel for a fire
a dynamite canyon with no trigger
a wash of Pollock like colors on a white faded canvas
i missed shot
as a missile flies forty miles over head
and that one sentence staring you down
breaking your brain
making you feel like alzheimers has set in
you are lost for words almost forgetting what they are
as sweat pours down your head
as your breain works out the solution
as no other letters appear
the alphabet is now your enemy
defeating you
and blocked inside all the ideas are
lost inside from all the rest of the page
and that first paragraph not even begun but begun with a letter
An A, telling us we are about to read some pages
but nothing is there
nothing comes out
you abandon it, try to sort it out,
but when you return each new night hoping to find out so fashionable solution
there is nothing there you are lost for words
abandoned underneath the fascination of your cataclysms
and you write another word
the pen in your hand, though you'd rather have a sword,
and the words won't come out
you see them clearly in the forefront of your mind,
even sitting on a bench in the back of your mind,
but your mind,
is wiltered, weathered and broken
seeking solutions for a solutions sake,
willing to write anything
even a half hearted confession that you can't write anything
but you just need something to say
and inside your screaming, beating yourself
your ideas, you torture them, you go over them with the a fine toothed comb
and you beg them to speak to come out throug your fingetips
but your ideas are shy, and stupid, they want to remain hidden but letting on just enough
and you die a little inside,
and you type out that first sentence, and you are satisfied but you return
and there it is glaring at you
a million mistakes but others can see only one
but you soldier on, and you try again and you type as fast as you can
half remembering what you wrote a minute ago, but trying to say something at all
and you see it looks kind of so-so, and here you are at the end of it all
chasing this dream
on computer screen or pads of paper
barreling down the monkey chute, into the garbage dumb
spilling it all over a white hooded sweater,
and the bug has bitten, and you are inflicted and you have to continue on
push on through, and what you find is a half truth and a beautiful whole lie
of something that you kind of sort of almost meant to say,
and you smile, and you are okay with this,
its something some sort of progress and you'll continue this chaos day in and day out
knowing that okay, it may be slow
but you will get there some day some how,
and you have discovered that though you have discourse deep inside you
the solution is staring you dead in the eyes
down an ever growing tunnel and you will always be playing catch up
but its oh so important to follow that light
into that dead of night
as your pencil hits the paper
and your sword spllices through it
surgical precision for about one minute or so
and then your stuck and you think and you write and you erase
and you repeat it once or thrice
and here we are running around this circle creating something, and then reducing it to nothing
only to make it grow again

Blue Ball of Yarn

Hello world
you big ball of blue and green and sore spots
you bruised beach ball
you sphere of matter
you watered down son of a space rock
you giver of life
you destroyer of decay
you swallower of grief
you spinning globe of delectable nutrition
you poisonous gas bag scattered under rock
you once thought flat big planet
you crazy locomotive without any rails
you big cheese with a little cheese out your rear view mirror
you sun tan lover
you skinny dipper
you crazy little yarn full of forests and rivers
you stupid large water balloon waiting for a fight
you old and young space rock floating about stuck where where you are
you longing for outer spaces of your outer space
you home to so many different species
you home to one in particular that doesn't appreciate what you've done here
you old so and so

I Will Become Happiness

i love to live as any good mannered living organism would say
i pride myself on the fact that I exist at all
i use to complain about my circumstance
but not I make my circumstance complain about me
that i don't give it enough attention
that i litter myself with distraction
that none of this will work out
but i brush it off and sweep it away
under the carpet of the day
under the facade of imprisonement
under the guise of a barrier
but its always there i know it i see it
however i choose not acknowledge it
however i choose to smile than despair
however i do my best to move on
but i can't always its true
i am going to think on it once in awhile
i am going to ponder what its influence is
but I will survive this
i will make it through to the end of the end
i will breathe easy and i will find love
i will find satisfaction in my circumstance
and this optimist will rub off on her
and she too will feel the joys i feel
wherever she is whoever she is we will be happy together
and i will continue to grow this happiness,
I will continue to shape it and smooth it out
and when she's here we can take on the world
take on this course that we both have taken
and strike down the pessimists
for i want feel joy
more joy than I can handle
i want to drown in it
breathe it in
and i will become like a bird on the wind soaring and gliding
with a perfect partner
who is less than perfect like me

Youth

Magic is a spectacle
Reminscent of a detestable,
Stench.
Cold and calcauated hope bring us closer to the light
But snuffs out the candle when we are close enough to,
See.
I don't remember you,
nor you me,
But we were meant to be in some time or
Space.
Cattle prodded the life force falters,
Shocked by pain and scattered about a field in ashes,
Sold.

the trouble with water

Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum
Couldn't put humpty dumpty together at last
And in their confusion severed the connection
the egg shell to the yolk

And Alice wandered aimlessly
When the cheshire cat was used to make a blanket
Grinning mischievously over a dead man's shoes,
In the middle of the Garden of Eden

the Mad Hatter wished a wishy washy lullaby,
On Cinderellas shoes,
As Adam and Eve made love,
And later bore Cain and Abel,
Who killed the one with a rock to the brain,
Bludgeoned as the Mad Hatter skipped to his lou

And the white rabbit rushed up on the face of big ben
Defying gravity as he sored with Peter Pan,
And entered neverland where time stood still
And he, the white rabbit, became certifiably insane,

On the skipping stone hearth,
Of an old sycamore house,
The Queen of Hearts cried into a saucer of milk,
Her roses were green,
And the seven dwarves had severed their stems
And made a bouquet for little red riding hood and poor little Goldilocks

Reminiscent of nothing the caterpillar puffed on his bong,
And got high off of nothing in particular
But his own personality,
And found it hilarious the absurdity he would have the reader believe,
As Ali baba spoke "open sesame" so was the caterpillar
Curshed up on the wall but the opening door
To the last remaining place that
Noah kept his ark.

The Recession of Our Lord

In a fitless rage an ark angel throws another from its perch
Like a bird with a broken wing the unfortunate seraphim falls through into the limitless quandries of self conciousness
Where all he thought about is drowning him
Where he could swim had never only flown before
And his talons claw to grip onto space
But there is no space solid enough to hold
And he tumbles and fumbles his way through time
And that rage filled ark angel smiles alone to admire himself in a hall of mirrors
As his brethren falls evermore into everlasting nothingness
Plummeting not to its death but to its everything its not
A reminder at the forefront of its mind of that mindless self indulgent priming
The waxing of its most sensitive areas
The cleansing of its eye sockets and the numbing of its gluteous maximus
Fog passes through it,
Wind rushes passed it
And the oceans waves crash about it like a thin blanket of water vapor
And as mere mortals are caught in the under tow
This unfortunate ark angel will relive it all over and over again
It does not despise itself, but it does despair
Its eternal journey onwards and upwards backwards and downdwards,
Tasting nothing for it moves to fast for its taste buds to sense,
For its skin to reflect,
For its mask to contempt,
Life rushes by it, the souls of a million lives trapped in a hades before it passes by its perch again
To see its raged brother/sister standing tall upon its talons,
Upon its perch,
Upon its glorious perfection,
And look here back at the undertow.